The Children and Socks

This is a perpetual problem. A problem that parents have sought answers to for generations....the missing socks. How is it that the two elders (by this i mean the two wisest people in the home, mom and dad) seem to have very little trouble matching up their socks after a wash cycle. However, the children seem to have no recollections as to the whereabouts of their socks? A mystery? No...a conspiracy. I've studied and researched this problem and as outrageous as it may seem the answer is plain and simple. The children have been abducted by aliens and the socks may have been forgotten on the craft. Hear me out. Here are some common things abductee's experience:

1. No Memory - Ask your child where the socks are at and they'll always answer the same way. I don't remember or I don't recall seeing them.

2. Pain or sickness - Once we establish the socks are missing I will ask the children to look for their socks. Mysteriously they fall ill unable to look for the socks and spending the rest of the afternoon in bed.

3. Lost time - Actually this one belongs to me. I lose time doing something valuable having to do something therapeutic such as writing this blog!

4. Encounters with strange creatures - I apologize, this one is mine also. I often times feel this way after walking into the children's room and observing them in their habitat.

After careful consideration it appears it is I who am an alien in this strange land. I need to talk with my wife....it appears we're not crazy after all.